J.D. Salinger, the legendary author of at least one book that everyone has read, has died. He was 91 if he was a day.

Having had lived for decades in self-imposed isolation in a small, remote house in Cornish, N.H., Salinger decided that he was still too close to humanity to be thoroughly left alone. Salinger died of natural causes at his home on Wednesday to pursue his dream of even greater isolation.

Jerome David Salinger was born Jan. 1, 1919, in New York City. His father was a wealthy importer of cheeses and meat and the family lived for years on Park Avenue badly in need of perfumes and colognes.

Salinger became famous for not wanting to be famous. In 1982, he sued a “man” who allegedly tried to sell a fictitious interview with the author to a “national” magazine. The impostor, who turned out to also be a work of fiction, agreed to desist and Salinger dropped the suit off at the cleaners.

Everyone else is doing their Best of the Aughts (and trying to come up with really clever nicknames for the past 10 years like the Aught No’s or the Naughties), well, we thought we’d post the Worst of the Past 10 years.

The first worst thing is this stupid belief that the decade ended in ’09. Which is like saying, hey remember your tenth birthday when you turned nine? Moronic, but I’ll buy in. So, here we are then:

The Soul Patrol
Hummers
Terri Schiavo’s Fan Club
Air travel
Yankees/Red Sox
Heckuva job, Brownie
freedom fries
TMZ
Swift Boaters for Truth
Dan Brown
The American Pie Franchise
overuse of the word “franchise”
Piper Palin
the story arc of “Lost”
Enzyte
Lady Caca, er, Gaga
Autism v. Obesity
Literacy
Leno
Heath Ledger’s pharmacist
The Levy’s of New Orleans, Bernie and Barbara
The levees of New Orleans, also
Social networking
Men ordering appletini’s
The Recount
Teabaggers
Terror
Auto-tune Evo Pitch Correcting Plug-in
Bill Engvall
Tyler Perry Presents Racial Stereotypes
more….

Welcome back from the break! Wow, we closed out the decade by taking the philistine show on the road. On ice!!! Which probably means we drank too much. Hey, how about those Aughts? Guess I won’t be retiring this century either. Don’t forget to tip your waitress…over.

Seriously, though. Avatar? Greatest movie ever? Take that to the gut, “Citizen Kane!” James Cameroon, who already has the highest grossing movie and a country named after him, has outdone himself. He’s taken the plots of “Dances with Wolves,” “Dancing with the Stars,” “Ben Hur” and “The Smurfs” and made a stunning visual mish-mash of delight. When the crippled guy becomes Brainy Smurf, you weep, laugh and pee all at the same time.

And for a few more dollars you can see the entire thing in 3D! Believe me you’ll be ducking and dodging enough to throw up your $7 popcorn. (Editor’s note: my popcorn was free because I take my own popcorn popper to the theater! Along with my own gin!)

So run like you just received new legs to a cinemaplex near you so you too can tell everyone you saw the biggest spectacular since “Titanic.” Special bonus points if you can figure out which blue creature is actually actress Helen Mirren. Hint: she’s kind of old.