Not sure why you still aren’t following us on The Twitter. We even have a helpful Twitter icon at the top of this page to remind you. It’s that easy. Like a Staples button affixed to your belly. Still not convinced? Well, here are some samples of LePhilistine4 tweets. And remember, they’re free while supplies exist.

#Santorum wearing ashes on head a day early to prove that he really gets it.

Pat Buchanan asks why Hannity didn’t see the racism in his book. Umm, he’s illiterate. Notice that his hairline reaches his nose.

Liam Neeson to star in “The Michael Caine Story.” Caine to play Neeson in a cameo. #hardworkingactors

Starting a line of men’s clothes called Timmy Bimini for the fella who would rather have a daiquiri with Liza than hit the beach.

That really evil part of me is kind of interested in a Nikki Manaj a trois. #sorryAdele

I’ve oft wondered if Cuff & Link liked Adrienne as much as Rocky did. Probably.

Tip for Mitt of the Day: always refer to religious book as The Newer Testament.

I sometimes get the words sugary and surgery mixed up. Sure hope this confectioner knows how to treat my gout!

Just bet the rent money on Super Bowl coin toss. Took heads. Oh my god, that’s so sad I’m a renter.

China Idol by far best show on television. “You’re going to work camp” inspires contestants to sing hearts out.